Have we lost the meaning of this winter holiday?

celebrating christmas with family has been "fun"... but i can't help wondering what's going on?
its starting to become a pagan time of gathering and filling up our stomachs and counting the dollars we recieve as presents.. some birthday party to Jesus...
i don't want to sound like i didn't enjoy spending time with family .. i love them soo much...
family was my everything for as long as i can remember...
but now i see depraved minds that are misguided by culture and tradition and doing things out of habit instead with the heart. not to judge... but i can't help what i see...
we need saving... but whats worse is we dont even see the problem..

sim's birthday

friends are good... :)






sim is 20 now. time flies.

This is what's in my heart right now...

Wounded and forsaken
I was shattered by the fall
Broken and forgotten
Feeling lost and all alone
Summoned by the King
Into the Master's courts
Lifted by the Savior
And cradled in His arms

I was carried to the table
Seated where I don't belong
Carried to the table
Swept away by His love
And I don't see my brokenness anymore
When I'm seated at the table of the Lord
I'm carried to the table
The table of the Lord

Fighting thoughts of fear
And wondering why He called my name
Am I good enough to share this cup
This world has left me lame
Even in my weakness
The Savior called my name
In His Holy presence
I'm healed and unashamed

You carried me, my God
You carried me

These Afflictions Eclipsed by Glory..

what is this unexplainable awareness that is coming over me all of a sudden?

from the craziness of project after paper after PPA and BYL and other social problem assignments... to the "running on 3 hrs of sleep all day" to the comments like, "get some sleep, next week i guess"... the whirlwind of emotions and the impossiblity of focusing on the one true love that is Christ....
yet, inspite and in light of all of this, He is there. he is right here. in ways i'll never understand. but through little rare glimpses of his..... glory!.. there's no other word that is sufficient, no word in our vocabulary that could describe, Oh, How HE LOVES US!